If you didn’t notice, I am wrapping up Pocahontas a little bit late.
I’ve been struggling the past few days. I’ve had dark and negative thoughts, paralyzing anxiety and unstoppable tears. My jaw and ear hurt from holding my mouth too tight. You know, the usual. I’m doing better today, but it always scares me when I have a relapse like this. And it always makes me wonder why? What has caused this one? What was the trigger? Was there one stressor too many that caused this episode? Is it my hormones? Some combination? Are there ever any answers?
But, I don’t want Pocahontas to get gypped because I’m having problems.
So, here is the wrap up of my goals during my month with Pocahontas. Let’s see how it went.
- Go canoeing
Status: Complete. See “Just Around the Riverbend with Pocahontas.” This was so much fun!
- Go to the Hopewell Culture National Historic Park https://www.nps.gov/hocu/index.htm
Status: Complete. I recommend it to everyone!
- Do something that helps nature.
Status: Incomplete. I dropped the ball on helping the planet. I did look up ways to help though, so, it’s the thought that counts?
Status: Incomplete. I ran out of time. And motivation. They looked so good, so I’m a bit disappointed that I didn’t make these. Maybe in the future.
- Figure out my own path – is it the smoothest course down the river or that other one with all the rocks and rapids?
Status: Still in progress. I’d say for the month though, complete. I mean, I did get a job promotion. (Yes, you may clap.) And as for which course to choose, I think it depends on the situation. And what your heart says. The trick is to listen to it, like Pocahontas does. If you don’t know what I mean, watch this scene. Hey! That rhymes! And if you do know what I mean, watch it anyway. (Grandmother Willow is a bad ass. And Pocahontas too, naturally. But I digress.)
I’m trying to do that now, to listen to my heart and not my head. My head is where depression is, but it has not taken over my heart. Boy, does that sound sappy. But it’s true. And I will not let it. Heart over head. Truth over stupid depressive thoughts and feelings.
Anyway, I want to thank Pocahontas for a month of twists and turns, but with much change. And change, I think that will be for the good.
And by the way, Belle says, “See you soon!”