I’ve had a difficult time being in sync with Merida. I was sick for a bit and while that might have had something to do it, I think the real reason is Merida is the last in the list of princesses, and I’ve found that I’m having a hard time with that. But, lo and behold, it’s April and I can’t leave Merida hanging.
Change is never easy, but it’s always happening (so that’s a fun conundrum). Merida herself is fighting change. She even bargains with a witch to prevent it.
In the movie Brave, I feel like change, destiny and fate are intertwined in meaning. In the beginning of the movie Merida says about destiny, “It’s the one thing we search for, or fight to change. Some never find it, but there are some who are led.”
I think some people also like to avoid it. Like me.
Have I mentioned that one of my triggers for my anxiety and depression is the feeling that I don’t know what to do with my life – that I’m not contributing, that I’m wasting my life away?
One of my not so great coping skills when I’m overwhelmed with negative feelings is to avoid. Does this eventually make things worse? Why yes, yes it does. Does that change my behavioral pattern? What do you think?
But I don’t have will o’ the wisps to follow like Merida.
There’s no witch who will change my mom to bear (she’d be overjoyed, I’m sure) and then we’ll go on an adventure and I’ll find myself and blah, blah, blah.
Maybe you have to live in Scotland for such things to happen. Or live in a movie.
What do I do now that this year of princesses is over? Where I am being led? Am I being led anywhere? What if I don’t know that I’m being led? What if I don’t like the destination?
Ugh, so many questions.
Also, I’m turning 29 on tomorrow. I’m always a bit melancholy around my birthday. Another year older, another year gone… (I go to counseling for a reason.)
One of my goals for Merida was to be brave. What did I write in my previous post? “What does it mean to be brave? How do I apply bravery to my life? What do I need to be brave about?”
The Merriam-Webster dictionary says “brave” means, “having or showing mental or moral strength to face danger, fear, or difficulty : having or showing courage.”
In other words, in order to be brave I should probably not avoid.
Merida too, tries to avoid her issues. She doesn’t want to get married or lose her freedom, so she fights for her own hand and when that doesn’t work, she follows the wisps.
While she is brave to do these dangerous things, she still avoids the issues at hand. Distraction. Another not so great coping mechanism.
Enough of that, I say.
We can avoid all we please, but change/destiny/fate is coming for all of us. Sometimes we can guide it, but most of the time we have to go with it.
While I would love some will o’ the wisps to help me out, I know that I need to do the brave thing and help myself.
That’s what Merida does, in the end. She takes action and learns to accept change. And it takes her down a different path than she expected.
What does she say at the end of the movie? (This is not a very good clip)
“Our fate lives within us. You only have to be brave enough to see it.”
Brave enough. You know what? I am brave enough. Who needs will ‘o the wisps anyway? I’ll find my own way.
Princessly Poised 